How To Not Be Nervous: 10 Useful Ways You May Not Know 2024
Updated on
- Written by Elesa Zehndorfer, PhD, Dr
Medically reviewed by
Melissa Mitri, MS, RD
You might have come across this article because you have a driving test tomorrow, a huge exam in the morning, or a major presentation to deliver in an hour or two. If so, we know the feeling! We know that these kinds of panic-inducing scenarios can fill anyone with dread.
And don’t get us started on those oh-too-predictable unwanted symptoms like clammy hands, a hammering heart rate, and sweating!
The great news? There are great coping strategies that you can learn to feel way more relaxed. That’s why in this article, we’ve curated our ten top scientifically-proven tips for feeling calmer and more in control in any anxiety-provoking situation.
We’ll explain how coping strategies can help you to effectively handle nervousness, stress, anxiety, and even depression — and when it’s the right time to seek professional help.
How To Stop Being Nervous?
In this article, we’ll discover how not to be nervous! Find out why our fight-or-flight system makes us feel nervous and why common nerve-inducing events like public speaking, driving tests, going on a date, and even sex can make us feel stressed. We’ll then share our top, scientifically-proven tips to stop feeling nervous, anxious, or stressed, which are: spending more time in nature, exercising, getting more sleep, talking to someone, avoiding caffeine, sugar, and alcohol, drinking more water, taking vitamins and minerals, practicing mindful breathing and meditation, and embracing your natural instincts! Finally, we discuss when you should seek professional help.
Why Do We Feel Nervous?
So why do we feel nervous? Well, the nerves you feel when facing a scary situation are actually your highly-evolved vertebrate stress response[1] kicking into high gear. Its function? To help us survive.
Nerves can hit us all in different scenarios, but when they do, our stress response is largely the same. For some of us, it might be driving anxiety[2] (where you feel nervous behind the wheel or sick with nerves at the thought of a driving test!). For others, it could be a fear of public speaking (officially known as glossophobia,[3] e.g., nerves over delivering a presentation).
Maybe performance anxiety[4] has hit you, inhibiting sexual performance (in the bedroom), workplace performance (in a job interview), or even academic performance (in an exam).
But in any of those different scenarios, your stress response will rapidly engage in exactly the same way. First, your ‘fight-or-flight’ response will cause the immediate release of the catecholamines epinephrine (adrenaline) and norepinephrine (noradrenaline).
You’ll immediately feel their effects — a rapidly elevated heart rate, shallow breathing, clammy hands, indigestion, a sudden urge to pee,[5] and fingers that tremble. Your pupils dilate, and your skin may even blush an embarrassing red. This phase is essential to help you fight or run in the face of a threat.
The second phase is a slower release of cortisol, a corticosteroid, from our adrenal glands, which is designed to help you maintain hypervigilance to that same threat. This stress response is designed to rapidly restore homeostasis,[6] or balance, to your body as quickly as possible.
Stress In The Modern World
This stress response is an evolutionary trait best suited to our days of living in harsher natural environments. However, these days, our stress is less ‘fight-or-flight’ oriented. So when a major public speaking moment fills us with fear, adrenaline courses through our veins to help us fight.
But with nothing truly dangerous to fight (or run from), we have no outlet to use up those hormones. The result? We feel shaky, nervous, hypervigilant, and, often, impotent, which can lead to our performance suffering.
But here’s the good news. If nerves are getting in the way of your ability to perform, there are certainly a lot of actions that you can take to stop nerves in their tracks — and feel in control again. Read on to discover how!
We’re going to take a look at the power of nature and exercise and why you need to prioritize sleep. Then we’ll discuss the effects of talking to a loved one, why you should swap out caffeine, sugar, and alcohol for water, and healthy foods and supplements to beat your nerves.
Finally, we’ll explain why breathing techniques, meditation, and embracing your natural instincts can help you to feel calm, cool, and collected anywhere you are.
10 Ways To Not Be Nervous
Here are our top ten go-to tips for dealing with nervous feelings! Many of these can be practiced in the moment, while some are longer-term strategies. All are scientifically proven to help.
Spend More Time In Nature
Feeling nervous? Head outside! Research tells us that spending even a short time in nature exerts a powerful effect[7] on our mental health, which means fewer attacks of nervousness and a calmer outlook. So if you’re feeling nervous before an interview, head out for an energizing jaunt around your local park first.
Exercise Regularly
Do you ever head out to the park or the beach for a brisk walk to clear your head? One reason why this strategy is such a great one is that it combines two major stress-busters[8] — nature and physical activity. In fact, even one bout of exercise in nature has been shown to create long-term benefits[9] on stress levels!
Getting Enough Sleep
The link between anxiety levels and sleep deprivation[10] has been widely recognized in scientific literature. Further, individuals with depression have been observed to display worse symptoms[11] in the presence of sleep deprivation.
Disrupted sleep is considered a powerful future indicator[12] of depression, partly because of its negative effects on emotional regulation. Aim for at least 7-8 hours of sleep a night, and establish a relaxing bedtime routine to help you fall asleep faster.
Talk To Someone
It is well documented that talking to someone if you feel troubled provides effective emotional relief.[13] The next time you are feeling nervous about a driving test, presentation, or exam, sit down with a trusted family member or friend and share a conversation about your worries.
And if someone comes to you for help, here’s how you can help them calm anxiety.
You Really Are What You Eat (And Drink!)
Avoid Caffeine, Alcohol, And Sugar
Did you know that sugar intake has been linked to[14] anxiety and depression? Similarly, caffeine has long been associated[15] with the onset and worsening of various psychiatric conditions. Alcohol is also well recognized as a cause of[16] emotional dysregulation, negative thinking and anxiety, and depression.
Drink More Water
In contrast to drinking alcohol, water can have a surprisingly powerful and positive effect on lowering anxiety. Dehydration has been found to have a negative effect on mood[17] and increase[18] anxiety.
Eat Your Vitamins And Minerals!
A randomized 2017 controlled study reports that a Mediterranean-style diet[19] supplemented with fish oils improves symptoms of depression. A healthy diet,[20] in general, is also associated with lower risks of depression.
Omega-3 supplements[21] have been observed to lower anxiety symptoms, while a four-week study[21] of vitamin and mineral supplementation reported significant improvement in the emotional mood of teenagers.
The Power Of Mindfulness
Mindful Breathing
Breathing techniques[22] and breathing exercises have been shown to help us relax, lower blood pressure, and mediate physical symptoms of stress.
The positive stress-lowering effects[23] of deep breathing have consequently been suggested as first-line, and adjunct, treatments for stress, anxiety, and depression, with diaphragmatic breathing relaxation training[24] resulting in improvements in anxiety.
Anxiety can also disrupt breathing,[25] so taking a few deep breaths can help us if we’re having a particularly hard time. Studies show that practicing deep breathing can even improve[26] decision-making!
Meditate
Mindfulness-based interventions,[27] such as meditation used in a workplace setting or via a smartphone app,[28] positively improve stress levels. That means that you can practice mindfulness and meditation in your office — and on the go — and experience a powerful mood boost!
While your fight-or-flight response powers up your sympathetic nervous system (boosting energy), meditation and mindful breathing both effectively stimulate your parasympathetic nervous system.[29] The result? A more relaxed, calmer, and less nervous state.
Embrace Your Natural Instincts (The Fight-Or-Flight Response Is Natural)
While we usually view the side effects of our stress response as inconvenient, annoying, or even stress-inducing, it is important to reframe those negative thoughts. Instead of being negative, recognize it for what it really is — a positive response (by your body and brain) to try to help and protect you. The question ultimately isn’t how to not get nervous but how to embrace the symptoms you experience — then engage with them positively.
The takeaway? If you want to feel less nervous before a big date, in the bedroom, or around your crush, engage in mindful breathing and meditative techniques to calm your mind and reduce performance anxiety.
Presentation nerves? Embrace your natural instincts because what you are experiencing is perfectly normal (and healthy). Use these feelings to drive you into action and motivate you. Head out for a brisk walk before the big moment, then stride into that room, feeling more in control.
When To See A Doctor
Anxiety is the most common mental health condition in the US, with the CDC reporting in February 2021 that over 41% of adults[30] have recently experienced symptoms of a depressive or anxiety disorder. While we are all affected by nerves at one point or other, feeling nervous shouldn’t disrupt your normal functioning or enjoyment of life.
If you feel as if your nerves might have escalated past that point, you should seek professional help, as it could be a symptom of stress, anxiety, or a depressive disorder or condition. We advise in these situations that, you contact your doctor immediately.
There are also many regulated therapists who can help you, either online or in person.
The Bottom Line
When it comes down to it, we’ve all experienced butterflies in the pit of our stomachs when we unexpectedly bumped into our crush at the mall. And who hasn’t fumbled the first few lines of a big presentation or messed up a reverse park on our driving test after executing it perfectly a hundred times before?
The bottom line is that messing up and feeling nervous sometimes are part of what makes us human. And that’s okay!
What isn’t okay is to suffer in silence if you feel that nerves or anxiety have begun to disrupt your enjoyment of life. That’s why you should always reach out to talk to a friend or professional if you need to or try out the coping strategies listed in this article. That way, you’ll feel more in control — no matter what life throws at you!
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Written by:
Elesa Zehndorfer, PhD, Dr
Medically reviewed by:
Medically reviewed by:
